You COULD BE attracted to this … Take a brief look at the journey of faith in the Seminary as shared by Dafrinn Diwo

ST PETER’S COLLEGE, KUCHING – Coming to the end of the year, the various  seminarians are asked to share their reflection on their faith journey in the seminary, to be published in their annual magazine, The Key.  With permission, I am reproducing one such sharing by Dafrinn Diwol entitled “My Faith Journey is a Learning Process” as follows:

Dafrinn Diwol:  Faith, what is faith?  Allow me to bring you to the meaning of faith as I know it.  In the Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary, the word ‘faith’ has several definitions.  One such definition defines faith as “a trust in somebody’s ability or knowledge”.  “A trust that somebody or something will do what has been promised.”  A second definition is a “strong religious belief”. 

It has been more than four years since I entered formation for the priesthood.  I have never seen God with my own eyes or touched Him, but I strongly believe that He is there, somewhere beyond my knowledge.  I know that He is ominpresent.  I realize that He is here, working on me even as I am reflecting on all my experiences and letting my heart be guided by the Holy Spirit.  “The Spirit will guide you into all truth.”  (John 16:13)  I just need to surrender myself to the Spirit of God.

I began the formation for priesthood in 2009 when I entered Aspirancy Year, which emphasized on the study of the English Language and community living.  I moved on to Initiation Year where I was exposed to pre-major seminary courses that stress on spiritual life.  The next stage at St Peter’s College (SPC), which is a major seminary located in Kuching,  prepares me for the study of Philosophy (2 years) and Theology (4 years).  I have just embarked on the 1st year of Theological studies.

There is a saying which is true:  “Learning process will never end.”  For me, my learning process will not end in the seminary!  I need to continue to study by myself, and to keep on gaining knowledge for the betterment of the people of God whom I hope to serve one day.

As my formation deepens, the courses are more challenging.  At times, I almost want to give up my vocation.  I see myself unworthy for priesthood, especially in terms of academic study.

As I recalled my school days, my academic level for SPM was just “cukup makan ja”!  I am not a fast learner but I can manage it with effort.

My 1st year of Theological studies has been very difficult.  As I read the notes over and over again, understanding slowly but surely came.  I noticed that as I gave all my difficulties to God and let Him work in me, my enthusiasm level rose.  I knew I just need to put effort into my study, which I did using any free time that I had for study and prayers.

Countless times I have prayed to God, asking Him to show the right path.  His words “Where is your faith?” (Lk 8:25) and “Have faith in God.” (Mk 11:22) touched me and urged me on.

At the beginning of the year, SPC would organize an in-house liturgy for Holy Week and Easter.  It is done so as to expose the students more fully to the liturgical services and for a better understanding of why the Church celebrates it.  The Year-3 students are usually put in charge to organize it

However, for 2013, there were only the two of us in Year 3 and 17other junior students.  In addition, I was also College student leader.  I thought I would not manage it.  But, when our turn came to organize it, we did it!

Reflecting on this experience, I realize that everything will be fine as long as I have faith in God, no matter the difficulties or the joys.